ENTalk about your feelings.
EspañolHabla sobre tus sentimientos.
Episode 24
Talk about your feelings.
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Martin: Talk about your feelings.
Julia: Welcome to Your English Toolbox, your slow English podcast where we train your ears step-by-step.
Martin: I am Martin.
Julia: And I am Julia.
Martin: How are you today?
Julia: Are you really fine?
Martin: Well, actually, I am a little bit tired and stressed about a project.
Julia: See, that is the problem with English learners and even native speakers.
Martin: We always say, "I am fine," because we are afraid to show our real emotions.
Julia: But language is a tool for connection.
Martin: If you cannot express sadness, frustration, or joy, you are only using half of your toolbox.
Julia: Today, we are going to go deep.
Martin: We will learn how to talk about difficult feelings.
Julia: We will learn how to confront people politely.
Martin: And we have a very special guest to help us understand why this is so important.
Julia: Please welcome Rose, a psychologist who joins us today.
Martin: Hello, Martin.
Hello, Julia.
It is wonderful to be here.
Julia: We are so happy to have you, Rose.
Martin: Rose, why is it so hard for people to say, "I am sad," or, "I am angry"?
Julia: It is often because we think negative feelings are bad.
We think we must be happy all the time to be accepted.
But from a psychological perspective, ignoring feelings is dangerous.
Martin: That is a great hook for our listeners.
Julia: So, are you ready to stop saying, "I am fine," and start speaking the truth?
Martin: Let's open Your English Toolbox.
Julia: Part 1: Identifying the Feeling.
Martin: Before we can talk, we must identify the word.
Julia: Many students only use happy, sad, or angry.
Martin: But English has thousands of nuances.
Julia: Rose, in your therapy sessions, what is the first step?
Martin: The first step is to name the emotion accurately.
There is a big difference between being angry and being frustrated.
Julia: Let's look at that difference.
Martin: Angry is a strong, hot feeling of displeasure.
For example, if I cannot find my keys, I am frustrated.
Julia: If someone steals my keys, I am angry.
Martin: That is a very clear distinction.
Julia: Rose, why does accuracy matter here?
Martin: We call this, "Name it to tame it."
Julia: If you say, "I am overwhelmed," you admit you have too much pressure.
Martin: Overwhelmed,
Julia: that is a fantastic B2-level word.
Martin: It means you have too much work or too much emotion to handle.
Julia: Listeners, are you feeling overwhelmed with your English study sometimes?
Martin: Encouraging, speaking very slowly, it is okay to admit it.
Julia: Another great word is anxious.
Martin: How is that different from afraid, Julia?
Julia: Afraid is usually about a real danger right now, like a lion.
Martin: Anxious is about something in the future like a job interview.
Julia: Exactly.
Anxiety lives in the future.
When you tell a friend, "I am feeling anxious about tomorrow," you invite them to help you.
Martin: So rule number one is precision.
Julia: Stop using bad, and start using frustrated, overwhelmed, or anxious.
Martin: Part 2: The Danger of Bottling Up.
Julia: Now we need some phrasal verbs.
Rose, what happens if we do not speak about our emotions?
Martin: Well, if you do not speak, you tend to bottle up your feelings.
Julia: To bottle up.
Martin: Imagine a bottle of soda.
Julia: You shake it and shake it, but you keep the cap on tight.
Martin: You are putting the feelings inside a bottle and closing it.
Julia: That is bottling up.
Martin: And when you bottle up your emotions, eventually the bottle explodes.
Julia: We have a phrasal verb for that explosion, too.
Martin: It is to lash out.
To lash out, this means to suddenly attack someone verbally because you are angry.
Julia: Imagine you bottled up your stress from work all day.
Martin: Then you come home and your husband asks, "What is for dinner?"
Julia: And you scream, "Why do you always ask me that?"
Martin: You lashed out at him.
Julia: And usually, you lash out at the people you love the most.
This damages relationships.
Martin: So, the opposite of bottling up is to open up.
Julia: To open up.
Martin: This means to start talking about your inner world.
Julia: Opening up requires vulnerability, but it builds trust.
I have a question for you, Rose.
Is there a physical benefit to opening up?
Martin: Absolutely.
When you bottle up, your cortisol levels, the stress hormone, go up.
When you open up, your brain releases oxytocin.
That is the bonding chemical.
Julia: So, speaking English is actually good for your health?
Martin: Only if you tell the truth.
Julia: Listeners, I want you to shadow this sentence with me to practice the phrasal verb.
Repeat after me.
I need to open up because I cannot bottle this up anymore.
Martin: Let's try one more time.
Don't lash out.
Just try to open up.
Julia: Part three, how to confront someone.
Martin: Okay, we know we should open up.
Julia: But what if the feeling is caused by another person?
Martin: This is the hard part.
Many learners stay silent because they are afraid to be rude.
Julia: Rose, is there a psychological trick to confront someone without fighting?
Martin: Yes, there is a classic tool we use.
It is called the I statement.
Julia: The I statement.
Martin: Can you explain how that works?
Julia: Usually when we confront someone, we use you statements.
We say, "You are rude," or, "You never listen to me."
Martin: That sounds like an attack.
Julia: And when I hear, "You never listen," I want to defend myself.
Martin: Exactly.
Instead, you should focus on your own feeling.
Julia: The formula is, "I feel when you..."
Martin: Let's look at the grammar of that.
Julia: Write I feel followed by an adjective.
Martin: Speaking very slowly, when you, followed by a verb.
So instead of saying, "You are annoying," what should I say, Rose?
You could say, "I feel frustrated when you interrupt me."
Julia: Notice the difference.
Martin: You are not saying the person is bad.
Julia: You are saying the action produces a feeling in you.
Martin: Let's practice some other examples.
Julia: Imagine your friend is always late.
Martin: Do not say, "You are so disrespectful."
Julia: That will start a fight.
Martin: Instead say, "I feel hurt when you arrive late because it feels like my time is not important."
Julia: You added the because, which explains the impact.
Martin: This invites the other person to understand you, not fight you.
Julia: Is it really that simple?
Martin: Simple to say, but hard to do.
It requires you to know your feeling first.
Julia: We also have a great expression for this moment of honesty.
It is to get something off your chest.
Imagine a heavy weight sitting on your chest.
You cannot breathe well.
When you finally say the truth, the weight is gone.
You got it off your chest.
Rose, how do patients feel after they get it off their chest?
They often sigh with relief, "Oh." They feel lighter.
Martin: They realize the fear was in their head.
So, listeners, if you are holding a heavy secret or a frustration, use the structure, "I feel X when you do Y."
Julia: Part four, asking about feelings.
Martin: We have talked about expressing ourselves.
Julia: But a conversation is a two-way street.
Martin: We need to ask other people how they feel.
Julia: And, "How are you?" is not enough.
Martin: "How are you?" is automatic.
Julia: It is a reflex, not a question.
Martin: Rose, how can we ask a question that invites a real answer?
Julia: You need to ask specific open-ended questions.
Martin: Instead of, "Are you okay?" which is a yes/no question,
Julia: try asking, "What is on your mind?"
Martin: "What is on your mind?"
Julia: That is a beautiful phrase.
Martin: It implies that you know the person is thinking about something.
Julia: Another great one is, "You seem a bit quiet today."
Martin: That is an observation, not a question, but it invites an answer.
Julia: "You seem quiet, is everything okay?" Yes, observing body language is key.
Martin: If you see someone looking down or sighing, you can say, "I notice you are sighing a lot.
Do you want to talk about it?"
Julia: This gives the other person permission to open up.
Martin: Or permission to stay silent.
Julia: It is very respectful.
Martin: Rose, what if the person starts crying?
Julia: Many English learners panic if someone cries.
Martin: They do not know what to say.
The best thing to say is often very simple.
Julia: You can say, "It is okay to cry," or, "I am here with you."
Martin: "I am here with you."
Julia: You do not need to fix the problem.
Martin: You just need to be present.
Julia: We also use the verb 'to empathize'.
Martin: To empathize means to feel what the other person is feeling.
Julia: It is different from sympathize.
Martin: Sympathy is feeling sorry for someone.
Julia: Empathy
Martin: is feeling with someone.
Julia: That is a crucial distinction.
Connection comes from empathy.
When you say, "I can imagine how hard that is," you are empathizing.
Listeners, these phrases are your lifeline in deep conversations.
Martin: "I can imagine how hard that is."
Julia: "Thank you for trusting me with this."
Martin: "I appreciate you telling me."
Julia: These are much better than just saying, "Don't worry!" Please, never say, "Don't worry," to someone in pain.
It invalidates their feelings.
It tells them their feeling is wrong.
Martin: White: Instead, validate them.
Julia: Say, "It makes sense that you are sad."
Martin: Part 5, The Emotional Toolbox.
Julia: We have covered a lot of ground today.
Martin: We moved from, "I am fine," to, "I am overwhelmed."
Julia: We learned to stop bottling up and start opening up.
Martin: We learned to get things off our chest using 'I' statements.
Julia: And we learned how to offer empathy.
Martin: Rose, as we finish, what is your final advice for our listeners?
Julia: My advice is to practice with small feelings first.
Do not wait for a big tragedy.
Practice telling a friend, "I felt a bit disappointed when the restaurant was closed." Practice the small muscles of vulnerability.
Then, when the big feelings come, you will be ready.
That is excellent advice.
Martin: Start small to build strength.
Julia: Language learning is exactly the same.
Martin: You practice small sentences so you can have big conversations.
Julia: Rose, thank you so much for joining us and sharing your wisdom.
Thank you for having me.
It was a pleasure.
Martin: It is amazing how psychology and language go hand-in-hand.
Julia: They are both about understanding the human experience.
Martin: Remember, your English does not have to be perfect to be emotional.
Julia: People connect with your heart, not your grammar.
Martin: But correct grammar helps.
Julia: Yes, it certainly helps.
Martin: Conclusion.
Julia: Before we go, I want to ask you one quick favor.
Martin: If you enjoyed this episode, please write a small comment before you go.
Julia: Your comments show the platforms that our community is real, active, and growing.
Martin: This support is crucial for us to continue creating new episodes every week.
Julia: Tell us how you are feeling today using one of the new words we learned.
Martin: Are you feeling motivated?
Overwhelmed?
Or perhaps relieved?
We need your comments because your voice is more important than ours.
Julia: Your voice and comments will show us the right path.
Martin: Thank you for listening.
Julia: See you in the next episode.
Line by line: one English sentence, then its Español translation —
clearly separated, each with its own lang markup.
ENTalk about your feelings.
EspañolHabla sobre tus sentimientos.
ENWelcome to Your English Toolbox, your slow English podcast where we train your ears step-by-step.
EspañolBienvenidos a Tu Caja de Herramientas en Inglés, tu podcast de inglés lento donde entrenamos tus oídos paso a paso.
ENI am Martin.
EspañolSoy Martín.
ENAnd I am Julia.
EspañolY yo soy Julia.
ENHow are you today?
Español¿Cómo estás hoy?
ENAre you really fine?
Español¿De verdad estás bien?
ENWell, actually, I am a little bit tired and stressed about a project.
EspañolBueno, en realidad, estoy un poco cansado y estresado por un proyecto.
ENSee, that is the problem with English learners and even native speakers.
EspañolVes, ese es el problema con los estudiantes de inglés e incluso con los hablantes nativos.
ENWe always say, "I am fine," because we are afraid to show our real emotions.
EspañolSiempre decimos, "Estoy bien," porque tenemos miedo de mostrar nuestras emociones reales.
ENBut language is a tool for connection.
EspañolPero el lenguaje es una herramienta para la conexión.
ENIf you cannot express sadness, frustration, or joy, you are only using half of your toolbox.
EspañolSi no puedes expresar tristeza, frustración o alegría, solo estás usando la mitad de tu caja de herramientas.
ENToday, we are going to go deep.
EspañolHoy, vamos a profundizar.
ENWe will learn how to talk about difficult feelings.
EspañolAprenderemos a hablar sobre sentimientos difíciles.
ENWe will learn how to confront people politely.
EspañolAprenderemos a confrontar a las personas de manera educada.
ENAnd we have a very special guest to help us understand why this is so important.
EspañolY tenemos un invitado muy especial que nos ayudará a entender por qué esto es tan importante.
ENPlease welcome Rose, a psychologist who joins us today.
EspañolPor favor, den la bienvenida a Rose, una psicóloga que se une a nosotros hoy.
ENHello, Martin.
EspañolHola, Martín.
ENHello, Julia.
EspañolHola, Julia.
ENIt is wonderful to be here.
EspañolEs maravilloso estar aquí.
ENWe are so happy to have you, Rose.
EspañolEstamos muy felices de tenerte, Rose.
ENRose, why is it so hard for people to say, "I am sad," or, "I am angry"?
EspañolRose, ¿por qué es tan difícil para las personas decir, "Estoy triste," o, "Estoy enojado"?
ENIt is often because we think negative feelings are bad.
EspañolA menudo es porque pensamos que los sentimientos negativos son malos.
ENWe think we must be happy all the time to be accepted.
EspañolPensamos que debemos estar felices todo el tiempo para ser aceptados.
ENBut from a psychological perspective, ignoring feelings is dangerous.
EspañolPero desde una perspectiva psicológica, ignorar los sentimientos es peligroso.
ENThat is a great hook for our listeners.
EspañolEsa es una gran introducción para nuestros oyentes.
ENSo, are you ready to stop saying, "I am fine," and start speaking the truth?
EspañolEntonces, ¿estás lista para dejar de decir, "Estoy bien," y empezar a hablar la verdad?
ENLet's open Your English Toolbox.
EspañolAbramos Tu Caja de Herramientas en Inglés.
ENPart 1: Identifying the Feeling.
EspañolParte 1: Identificando el Sentimiento.
ENBefore we can talk, we must identify the word.
EspañolAntes de que podamos hablar, debemos identificar la palabra.
ENMany students only use happy, sad, or angry.
EspañolMuchos estudiantes solo usan feliz, triste o enojado.
ENBut English has thousands of nuances.
EspañolPero el inglés tiene miles de matices.
ENRose, in your therapy sessions, what is the first step?
EspañolRose, en tus sesiones de terapia, ¿cuál es el primer paso?
ENThe first step is to name the emotion accurately.
EspañolEl primer paso es nombrar la emoción con precisión.
ENThere is a big difference between being angry and being frustrated.
EspañolHay una gran diferencia entre estar enojado y estar frustrado.
ENLet's look at that difference.
EspañolVeamos esa diferencia.
ENAngry is a strong, hot feeling of displeasure.
EspañolEnojado es un sentimiento fuerte y caliente de desagrado.
ENFor example, if I cannot find my keys, I am frustrated.
EspañolPor ejemplo, si no puedo encontrar mis llaves, estoy frustrado.
ENIf someone steals my keys, I am angry.
EspañolSi alguien me roba las llaves, estoy enojado.
ENThat is a very clear distinction.
EspañolEsa es una distinción muy clara.
ENRose, why does accuracy matter here?
EspañolRose, ¿por qué importa la precisión aquí?
ENWe call this, "Name it to tame it."
EspañolLlamamos a esto, "Nombrarlo para domarlo."
ENIf you say, "I am overwhelmed," you admit you have too much pressure.
EspañolSi dices, "Estoy abrumado," admites que tienes demasiada presión.
ENOverwhelmed,
EspañolAbrumado,
ENthat is a fantastic B2-level word.
Españolesa es una palabra fantástica de nivel B2.
ENIt means you have too much work or too much emotion to handle.
EspañolSignifica que tienes demasiado trabajo o demasiada emoción para manejar.
ENListeners, are you feeling overwhelmed with your English study sometimes?
EspañolOyentes, ¿se sienten abrumados con su estudio de inglés a veces?
ENEncouraging, speaking very slowly, it is okay to admit it.
EspañolEs alentador, hablar muy despacio, está bien admitirlo.
ENAnother great word is anxious.
EspañolOtra gran palabra es ansioso.
ENHow is that different from afraid, Julia?
Español¿Cómo se diferencia eso de tener miedo, Julia?
ENAfraid is usually about a real danger right now, like a lion.
EspañolTener miedo generalmente se refiere a un peligro real ahora mismo, como un león.
ENAnxious is about something in the future like a job interview.
EspañolAnsioso se refiere a algo en el futuro, como una entrevista de trabajo.
ENExactly.
EspañolExactamente.
ENAnxiety lives in the future.
EspañolLa ansiedad vive en el futuro.
ENWhen you tell a friend, "I am feeling anxious about tomorrow," you invite them to help you.
EspañolCuando le dices a un amigo, "Me siento ansioso por mañana," lo invitas a ayudarte.
ENSo rule number one is precision.
EspañolAsí que la regla número uno es precisión.
ENStop using bad, and start using frustrated, overwhelmed, or anxious.
EspañolDeja de usar malo, y empieza a usar frustrado, abrumado o ansioso.
ENPart 2: The Danger of Bottling Up.
EspañolParte 2: El Peligro de Reprimir.
ENNow we need some phrasal verbs.
EspañolAhora necesitamos algunos phrasal verbs.
ENRose, what happens if we do not speak about our emotions?
EspañolRose, ¿qué pasa si no hablamos sobre nuestras emociones?
ENWell, if you do not speak, you tend to bottle up your feelings.
EspañolBueno, si no hablas, tiendes a reprimir tus sentimientos.
ENTo bottle up.
EspañolReprimir.
ENImagine a bottle of soda.
EspañolImagina una botella de refresco.
ENYou shake it and shake it, but you keep the cap on tight.
EspañolLa agitas y la agitas, pero mantienes la tapa bien cerrada.
ENYou are putting the feelings inside a bottle and closing it.
EspañolEstás poniendo los sentimientos dentro de una botella y cerrándola.
ENThat is bottling up.
EspañolEso es reprimir.
ENAnd when you bottle up your emotions, eventually the bottle explodes.
EspañolY cuando reprimes tus emociones, eventualmente la botella explota.
ENWe have a phrasal verb for that explosion, too.
EspañolTambién tenemos un phrasal verb para esa explosión.
ENIt is to lash out.
EspañolEs desquitarse.
ENTo lash out, this means to suddenly attack someone verbally because you are angry.
EspañolDesquitarse significa atacar repentinamente a alguien verbalmente porque estás enojado.
ENImagine you bottled up your stress from work all day.
EspañolImagina que has reprimido tu estrés del trabajo todo el día.
ENThen you come home and your husband asks, "What is for dinner?"
EspañolLuego llegas a casa y tu esposo pregunta, "¿Qué hay para cenar?"
ENAnd you scream, "Why do you always ask me that?"
EspañolY gritas, "¿Por qué siempre me preguntas eso?"
ENYou lashed out at him.
EspañolTe desquitaste con él.
ENAnd usually, you lash out at the people you love the most.
EspañolY generalmente, te desquitas con las personas que más amas.
ENThis damages relationships.
EspañolEsto daña las relaciones.
ENSo, the opposite of bottling up is to open up.
EspañolAsí que, el opuesto de reprimir es abrirse.
ENTo open up.
EspañolAbrirse.
ENThis means to start talking about your inner world.
EspañolEsto significa comenzar a hablar sobre tu mundo interior.
ENOpening up requires vulnerability, but it builds trust.
EspañolAbrirse requiere vulnerabilidad, pero construye confianza.
ENI have a question for you, Rose.
EspañolTengo una pregunta para ti, Rose.
ENIs there a physical benefit to opening up?
Español¿Hay un beneficio físico al abrirse?
ENAbsolutely.
EspañolAbsolutamente.
ENWhen you bottle up, your cortisol levels, the stress hormone, go up.
EspañolCuando reprimes, tus niveles de cortisol, la hormona del estrés, aumentan.
ENWhen you open up, your brain releases oxytocin.
EspañolCuando te abres, tu cerebro libera oxitocina.
ENThat is the bonding chemical.
EspañolEsa es la sustancia química del vínculo.
ENSo, speaking English is actually good for your health?
EspañolEntonces, ¿hablar inglés es realmente bueno para tu salud?
ENOnly if you tell the truth.
EspañolSolo si dices la verdad.
ENListeners, I want you to shadow this sentence with me to practice the phrasal verb.
EspañolOyentes, quiero que repitan esta frase conmigo para practicar el phrasal verb.
ENRepeat after me.
EspañolRepitan después de mí.
ENI need to open up because I cannot bottle this up anymore.
EspañolNecesito abrirme porque no puedo reprimir esto más.
ENLet's try one more time.
EspañolIntentemos una vez más.
ENDon't lash out.
EspañolNo te desquites.
ENJust try to open up.
EspañolSolo intenta abrirte.
ENPart three, how to confront someone.
EspañolParte tres, cómo confrontar a alguien.
ENOkay, we know we should open up.
EspañolEstá bien, sabemos que debemos abrirnos.
ENBut what if the feeling is caused by another person?
EspañolPero, ¿qué pasa si el sentimiento es causado por otra persona?
ENThis is the hard part.
EspañolEsta es la parte difícil.
ENMany learners stay silent because they are afraid to be rude.
EspañolMuchos estudiantes se quedan en silencio porque tienen miedo de ser groseros.
ENRose, is there a psychological trick to confront someone without fighting?
EspañolRose, ¿hay un truco psicológico para confrontar a alguien sin pelear?
ENYes, there is a classic tool we use.
EspañolSí, hay una herramienta clásica que usamos.
ENIt is called the I statement.
EspañolSe llama la declaración en primera persona.
ENThe I statement.
EspañolLa declaración en primera persona.
ENCan you explain how that works?
Español¿Puedes explicar cómo funciona?
ENUsually when we confront someone, we use you statements.
EspañolGeneralmente, cuando confrontamos a alguien, usamos declaraciones en segunda persona.
ENWe say, "You are rude," or, "You never listen to me."
EspañolDecimos, "Eres grosero," o, "Nunca me escuchas."
ENThat sounds like an attack.
EspañolEso suena como un ataque.
ENAnd when I hear, "You never listen," I want to defend myself.
EspañolY cuando escucho, "Nunca escuchas," quiero defenderme.
ENExactly.
EspañolExactamente.
ENInstead, you should focus on your own feeling.
EspañolEn su lugar, deberías enfocarte en tu propio sentimiento.
ENThe formula is, "I feel when you..."
EspañolLa fórmula es, "Me siento cuando tú..."
ENLet's look at the grammar of that.
EspañolVeamos la gramática de eso.
ENWrite I feel followed by an adjective.
EspañolEscribe me siento seguido de un adjetivo.
ENSpeaking very slowly, when you, followed by a verb.
EspañolHablando muy despacio, cuando tú, seguido de un verbo.
ENSo instead of saying, "You are annoying," what should I say, Rose?
EspañolEntonces, en lugar de decir, "Eres molesto," ¿qué debería decir, Rose?
ENYou could say, "I feel frustrated when you interrupt me."
EspañolPodrías decir, "Me siento frustrado cuando me interrumpes."
ENNotice the difference.
EspañolNota la diferencia.
ENYou are not saying the person is bad.
EspañolNo estás diciendo que la persona es mala.
ENYou are saying the action produces a feeling in you.
EspañolEstás diciendo que la acción produce un sentimiento en ti.
ENLet's practice some other examples.
EspañolPractiquemos algunos otros ejemplos.
ENImagine your friend is always late.
EspañolImagina que tu amigo siempre llega tarde.
ENDo not say, "You are so disrespectful."
EspañolNo digas, "Eres tan irrespetuoso."
ENThat will start a fight.
EspañolEso comenzará una pelea.
ENInstead say, "I feel hurt when you arrive late because it feels like my time is not important."
EspañolEn su lugar, di, "Me siento herido cuando llegas tarde porque siento que mi tiempo no es importante."
ENYou added the because, which explains the impact.
EspañolAgregaste el porque, que explica el impacto.
ENThis invites the other person to understand you, not fight you.
EspañolEsto invita a la otra persona a entenderte, no a pelear contigo.
ENIs it really that simple?
Español¿Es realmente tan simple?
ENSimple to say, but hard to do.
EspañolSimple de decir, pero difícil de hacer.
ENIt requires you to know your feeling first.
EspañolRequiere que primero conozcas tu sentimiento.
ENWe also have a great expression for this moment of honesty.
EspañolTambién tenemos una gran expresión para este momento de honestidad.
ENIt is to get something off your chest.
EspañolEs sacar algo de tu pecho.
ENImagine a heavy weight sitting on your chest.
EspañolImagina un peso pesado sobre tu pecho.
ENYou cannot breathe well.
EspañolNo puedes respirar bien.
ENWhen you finally say the truth, the weight is gone.
EspañolCuando finalmente dices la verdad, el peso se va.
ENYou got it off your chest.
EspañolLo sacaste de tu pecho.
ENRose, how do patients feel after they get it off their chest?
EspañolRose, ¿cómo se sienten los pacientes después de sacar algo de su pecho?
ENThey often sigh with relief, "Oh." They feel lighter.
EspañolA menudo suspiran de alivio, "Oh." Se sienten más ligeros.
ENThey realize the fear was in their head.
EspañolSe dan cuenta de que el miedo estaba en su cabeza.
ENSo, listeners, if you are holding a heavy secret or a frustration, use the structure, "I feel X when you do Y."
EspañolAsí que, oyentes, si están guardando un secreto pesado o una frustración, usen la estructura, "Me siento X cuando tú haces Y."
ENPart four, asking about feelings.
EspañolParte cuatro, preguntando sobre sentimientos.
ENWe have talked about expressing ourselves.
EspañolHemos hablado sobre expresarnos.
ENBut a conversation is a two-way street.
EspañolPero una conversación es una calle de dos vías.
ENWe need to ask other people how they feel.
EspañolNecesitamos preguntar a otras personas cómo se sienten.
ENAnd, "How are you?" is not enough.
EspañolY, "¿Cómo estás?" no es suficiente.
EN"How are you?" is automatic.
Español"¿Cómo estás?" es automático.
ENIt is a reflex, not a question.
EspañolEs un reflejo, no una pregunta.
ENRose, how can we ask a question that invites a real answer?
EspañolRose, ¿cómo podemos hacer una pregunta que invite a una respuesta real?
ENYou need to ask specific open-ended questions.
EspañolNecesitas hacer preguntas abiertas específicas.
ENInstead of, "Are you okay?" which is a yes/no question,
EspañolEn lugar de, "¿Estás bien?" que es una pregunta de sí/no,
ENtry asking, "What is on your mind?"
Españolintenta preguntar, "¿Qué tienes en mente?"
EN"What is on your mind?"
Español"¿Qué tienes en mente?"
ENThat is a beautiful phrase.
EspañolEsa es una hermosa frase.
ENIt implies that you know the person is thinking about something.
EspañolImplica que sabes que la persona está pensando en algo.
ENAnother great one is, "You seem a bit quiet today."
EspañolOtra buena es, "Pareces un poco callado hoy."
ENThat is an observation, not a question, but it invites an answer.
EspañolEsa es una observación, no una pregunta, pero invita a una respuesta.
EN"You seem quiet, is everything okay?" Yes, observing body language is key.
Español"Pareces callado, ¿está todo bien?" Sí, observar el lenguaje corporal es clave.
ENIf you see someone looking down or sighing, you can say, "I notice you are sighing a lot.
EspañolSi ves a alguien luciendo decaído o suspirando, puedes decir, "Noté que estás suspirando mucho.
ENDo you want to talk about it?"
Español¿Quieres hablar de ello?"
ENThis gives the other person permission to open up.
EspañolEsto le da a la otra persona permiso para abrirse.
ENOr permission to stay silent.
EspañolO permiso para quedarse en silencio.
ENIt is very respectful.
EspañolEs muy respetuoso.
ENRose, what if the person starts crying?
EspañolRose, ¿qué pasa si la persona comienza a llorar?
ENMany English learners panic if someone cries.
EspañolMuchos estudiantes de inglés entran en pánico si alguien llora.
ENThey do not know what to say.
EspañolNo saben qué decir.
ENThe best thing to say is often very simple.
EspañolLo mejor que se puede decir a menudo es muy simple.
ENYou can say, "It is okay to cry," or, "I am here with you."
EspañolPuedes decir, "Está bien llorar," o, "Estoy aquí contigo."
EN"I am here with you."
Español"Estoy aquí contigo."
ENYou do not need to fix the problem.
EspañolNo necesitas solucionar el problema.
ENYou just need to be present.
EspañolSolo necesitas estar presente.
ENWe also use the verb 'to empathize'.
EspañolTambién usamos el verbo 'empatizar'.
ENTo empathize means to feel what the other person is feeling.
EspañolEmpatizar significa sentir lo que la otra persona está sintiendo.
ENIt is different from sympathize.
EspañolEs diferente de simpatizar.
ENSympathy is feeling sorry for someone.
EspañolLa simpatía es sentir pena por alguien.
ENEmpathy
EspañolLa empatía
ENis feeling with someone.
Españoles sentir con alguien.
ENThat is a crucial distinction.
EspañolEsa es una distinción crucial.
ENConnection comes from empathy.
EspañolLa conexión proviene de la empatía.
ENWhen you say, "I can imagine how hard that is," you are empathizing.
EspañolCuando dices, "Puedo imaginar lo difícil que es eso," estás empatizando.
ENListeners, these phrases are your lifeline in deep conversations.
EspañolOyentes, estas frases son su salvavidas en conversaciones profundas.
EN"I can imagine how hard that is."
Español"Puedo imaginar lo difícil que es eso."
EN"Thank you for trusting me with this."
Español"Gracias por confiarme esto."
EN"I appreciate you telling me."
Español"Aprecio que me lo digas."
ENThese are much better than just saying, "Don't worry!" Please, never say, "Don't worry," to someone in pain.
EspañolEstas son mucho mejores que simplemente decir, "¡No te preocupes!" Por favor, nunca digas, "¡No te preocupes!" a alguien que está sufriendo.
ENIt invalidates their feelings.
EspañolInvalidan sus sentimientos.
ENIt tells them their feeling is wrong.
EspañolLes dice que su sentimiento está mal.
ENWhite: Instead, validate them.
EspañolEn su lugar, valídalos.
ENSay, "It makes sense that you are sad."
EspañolDi, "Tiene sentido que estés triste."
ENPart 5, The Emotional Toolbox.
EspañolParte 5, La Caja de Herramientas Emocionales.
ENWe have covered a lot of ground today.
EspañolHemos cubierto mucho hoy.
ENWe moved from, "I am fine," to, "I am overwhelmed."
EspañolPasamos de, "Estoy bien," a, "Estoy abrumado."
ENWe learned to stop bottling up and start opening up.
EspañolAprendimos a dejar de reprimir y comenzar a abrirnos.
ENWe learned to get things off our chest using 'I' statements.
EspañolAprendimos a sacar cosas de nuestro pecho usando declaraciones en primera persona.
ENAnd we learned how to offer empathy.
EspañolY aprendimos a ofrecer empatía.
ENRose, as we finish, what is your final advice for our listeners?
EspañolRose, al finalizar, ¿cuál es tu consejo final para nuestros oyentes?
ENMy advice is to practice with small feelings first.
EspañolMi consejo es practicar primero con pequeños sentimientos.
ENDo not wait for a big tragedy.
EspañolNo esperes a una gran tragedia.
ENPractice telling a friend, "I felt a bit disappointed when the restaurant was closed." Practice the small muscles of vulnerability.
EspañolPractica decirle a un amigo, "Me sentí un poco decepcionado cuando el restaurante estaba cerrado." Practica los pequeños músculos de la vulnerabilidad.
ENThen, when the big feelings come, you will be ready.
EspañolLuego, cuando lleguen los grandes sentimientos, estarás listo.
ENThat is excellent advice.
EspañolEse es un excelente consejo.
ENStart small to build strength.
EspañolComienza pequeño para construir fuerza.
ENLanguage learning is exactly the same.
EspañolEl aprendizaje de idiomas es exactamente lo mismo.
ENYou practice small sentences so you can have big conversations.
EspañolPracticas pequeñas oraciones para poder tener grandes conversaciones.
ENRose, thank you so much for joining us and sharing your wisdom.
EspañolRose, muchas gracias por unirte a nosotros y compartir tu sabiduría.
ENThank you for having me.
EspañolGracias por tenerme.
ENIt was a pleasure.
EspañolFue un placer.
ENIt is amazing how psychology and language go hand-in-hand.
EspañolEs asombroso cómo la psicología y el lenguaje van de la mano.
ENThey are both about understanding the human experience.
EspañolAmbos tratan sobre entender la experiencia humana.
ENRemember, your English does not have to be perfect to be emotional.
EspañolRecuerda, tu inglés no tiene que ser perfecto para ser emocional.
ENPeople connect with your heart, not your grammar.
EspañolLas personas se conectan con tu corazón, no con tu gramática.
ENBut correct grammar helps.
EspañolPero una gramática correcta ayuda.
ENYes, it certainly helps.
EspañolSí, ciertamente ayuda.
ENConclusion.
EspañolConclusión.
ENBefore we go, I want to ask you one quick favor.
EspañolAntes de irnos, quiero pedirte un pequeño favor.
ENIf you enjoyed this episode, please write a small comment before you go.
EspañolSi disfrutaste este episodio, por favor escribe un pequeño comentario antes de irte.
ENYour comments show the platforms that our community is real, active, and growing.
EspañolTus comentarios muestran a las plataformas que nuestra comunidad es real, activa y está creciendo.
ENThis support is crucial for us to continue creating new episodes every week.
EspañolEste apoyo es crucial para que podamos seguir creando nuevos episodios cada semana.
ENTell us how you are feeling today using one of the new words we learned.
EspañolCuéntanos cómo te sientes hoy usando una de las nuevas palabras que aprendimos.
ENAre you feeling motivated?
Español¿Te sientes motivado?
ENOverwhelmed?
Español¿Abrumado?
ENOr perhaps relieved?
Español¿O quizás aliviado?
ENWe need your comments because your voice is more important than ours.
EspañolNecesitamos tus comentarios porque tu voz es más importante que la nuestra.
ENYour voice and comments will show us the right path.
EspañolTu voz y comentarios nos mostrarán el camino correcto.
ENThank you for listening.
EspañolGracias por escuchar.
ENSee you in the next episode.
EspañolNos vemos en el próximo episodio.
Line by line: one English sentence, then its Deutsch translation —
clearly separated, each with its own lang markup.
ENTalk about your feelings.
DeutschSprich über deine Gefühle.
ENWelcome to Your English Toolbox, your slow English podcast where we train your ears step-by-step.
DeutschWillkommen zu deinem Englisch-Werkzeugkasten, deinem langsamen Englisch-Podcast, in dem wir Schritt für Schritt dein Gehör trainieren.
ENI am Martin.
DeutschIch bin Martin.
ENAnd I am Julia.
DeutschUnd ich bin Julia.
ENHow are you today?
DeutschWie geht es dir heute?
ENAre you really fine?
DeutschGeht es dir wirklich gut?
ENWell, actually, I am a little bit tired and stressed about a project.
DeutschNun, eigentlich bin ich ein bisschen müde und gestresst wegen eines Projekts.
ENSee, that is the problem with English learners and even native speakers.
DeutschSiehst du, das ist das Problem bei Englischlernern und sogar bei Muttersprachlern.
ENWe always say, "I am fine," because we are afraid to show our real emotions.
DeutschWir sagen immer: "Es geht mir gut", weil wir Angst haben, unsere echten Emotionen zu zeigen.
ENBut language is a tool for connection.
DeutschAber Sprache ist ein Werkzeug zur Verbindung.
ENIf you cannot express sadness, frustration, or joy, you are only using half of your toolbox.
DeutschWenn du Traurigkeit, Frustration oder Freude nicht ausdrücken kannst, benutzt du nur die Hälfte deines Werkzeugkastens.
ENToday, we are going to go deep.
DeutschHeute werden wir tief eintauchen.
ENWe will learn how to talk about difficult feelings.
DeutschWir werden lernen, wie man über schwierige Gefühle spricht.
ENWe will learn how to confront people politely.
DeutschWir werden lernen, wie man Menschen höflich konfrontiert.
ENAnd we have a very special guest to help us understand why this is so important.
DeutschUnd wir haben einen ganz besonderen Gast, der uns hilft zu verstehen, warum das so wichtig ist.
ENPlease welcome Rose, a psychologist who joins us today.
DeutschBitte begrüßt Rose, eine Psychologin, die heute bei uns ist.
ENHello, Martin.
DeutschHallo, Martin.
ENHello, Julia.
DeutschHallo, Julia.
ENIt is wonderful to be here.
DeutschEs ist wunderbar, hier zu sein.
ENWe are so happy to have you, Rose.
DeutschWir freuen uns sehr, dich hier zu haben, Rose.
ENRose, why is it so hard for people to say, "I am sad," or, "I am angry"?
DeutschRose, warum fällt es den Menschen so schwer zu sagen: "Ich bin traurig" oder "Ich bin wütend"?
ENIt is often because we think negative feelings are bad.
DeutschDas liegt oft daran, dass wir negative Gefühle für schlecht halten.
ENWe think we must be happy all the time to be accepted.
DeutschWir denken, wir müssen die ganze Zeit glücklich sein, um akzeptiert zu werden.
ENBut from a psychological perspective, ignoring feelings is dangerous.
DeutschAber aus psychologischer Sicht ist es gefährlich, Gefühle zu ignorieren.
ENThat is a great hook for our listeners.
DeutschDas ist ein großartiger Aufhänger für unsere Zuhörer.
ENSo, are you ready to stop saying, "I am fine," and start speaking the truth?
DeutschBist du bereit, aufzuhören zu sagen: "Es geht mir gut" und anzufangen, die Wahrheit zu sagen?
ENLet's open Your English Toolbox.
DeutschLass uns deinen Englisch-Werkzeugkasten öffnen.
ENPart 1: Identifying the Feeling.
DeutschTeil 1: Das Gefühl identifizieren.
ENBefore we can talk, we must identify the word.
DeutschBevor wir sprechen können, müssen wir das Wort identifizieren.
ENMany students only use happy, sad, or angry.
DeutschViele Schüler verwenden nur glücklich, traurig oder wütend.
ENBut English has thousands of nuances.
DeutschAber Englisch hat Tausende von Nuancen.
ENRose, in your therapy sessions, what is the first step?
DeutschRose, was ist der erste Schritt in deinen Therapiesitzungen?
ENThe first step is to name the emotion accurately.
DeutschDer erste Schritt ist, die Emotion genau zu benennen.
ENThere is a big difference between being angry and being frustrated.
DeutschEs gibt einen großen Unterschied zwischen wütend sein und frustriert sein.
ENLet's look at that difference.
DeutschSchauen wir uns diesen Unterschied an.
ENAngry is a strong, hot feeling of displeasure.
DeutschWütend ist ein starkes, heißes Gefühl des Missmuts.
ENFor example, if I cannot find my keys, I am frustrated.
DeutschZum Beispiel, wenn ich meine Schlüssel nicht finde, bin ich frustriert.
ENIf someone steals my keys, I am angry.
DeutschWenn mir jemand meine Schlüssel stiehlt, bin ich wütend.
ENThat is a very clear distinction.
DeutschDas ist eine sehr klare Unterscheidung.
ENRose, why does accuracy matter here?
DeutschRose, warum ist Genauigkeit hier wichtig?
ENWe call this, "Name it to tame it."
DeutschWir nennen das: "Benennen, um zu zähmen."
ENIf you say, "I am overwhelmed," you admit you have too much pressure.
DeutschWenn du sagst: "Ich fühle mich überwältigt", gibst du zu, dass du zu viel Druck hast.
ENOverwhelmed,
DeutschÜberwältigt,
ENthat is a fantastic B2-level word.
Deutschdas ist ein fantastisches Wort auf B2-Niveau.
ENIt means you have too much work or too much emotion to handle.
DeutschEs bedeutet, dass du zu viel Arbeit oder zu viele Emotionen hast, um damit umzugehen.
ENListeners, are you feeling overwhelmed with your English study sometimes?
DeutschZuhörer, fühlt ihr euch manchmal überwältigt von eurem Englisch-Studium?
ENEncouraging, speaking very slowly, it is okay to admit it.
DeutschErmutigend, sprich sehr langsam, es ist okay, das zuzugeben.
ENAnother great word is anxious.
DeutschEin weiteres großartiges Wort ist ängstlich.
ENHow is that different from afraid, Julia?
DeutschWie unterscheidet sich das von ängstlich, Julia?
ENAfraid is usually about a real danger right now, like a lion.
DeutschÄngstlich bezieht sich normalerweise auf eine reale Gefahr im Moment, wie einen Löwen.
ENAnxious is about something in the future like a job interview.
DeutschÄngstlich bezieht sich auf etwas in der Zukunft, wie ein Vorstellungsgespräch.
ENExactly.
DeutschGenau.
ENAnxiety lives in the future.
DeutschAngst lebt in der Zukunft.
ENWhen you tell a friend, "I am feeling anxious about tomorrow," you invite them to help you.
DeutschWenn du einem Freund sagst: "Ich fühle mich ängstlich wegen morgen", lädst du ihn ein, dir zu helfen.
ENSo rule number one is precision.
DeutschAlso ist Regel Nummer eins Präzision.
ENStop using bad, and start using frustrated, overwhelmed, or anxious.
DeutschHör auf, schlecht zu sagen, und fang an, frustriert, überwältigt oder ängstlich zu sagen.
ENPart 2: The Danger of Bottling Up.
DeutschTeil 2: Die Gefahr des Unterdrückens.
ENNow we need some phrasal verbs.
DeutschJetzt brauchen wir einige Phrasal Verbs.
ENRose, what happens if we do not speak about our emotions?
DeutschRose, was passiert, wenn wir nicht über unsere Emotionen sprechen?
ENWell, if you do not speak, you tend to bottle up your feelings.
DeutschNun, wenn du nicht sprichst, neigst du dazu, deine Gefühle zu unterdrücken.
ENTo bottle up.
DeutschUnterdrücken.
ENImagine a bottle of soda.
DeutschStell dir eine Flasche Limonade vor.
ENYou shake it and shake it, but you keep the cap on tight.
DeutschDu schüttelst sie und schüttelst sie, aber du hältst den Deckel fest zu.
ENYou are putting the feelings inside a bottle and closing it.
DeutschDu steckst die Gefühle in eine Flasche und schließt sie.
ENThat is bottling up.
DeutschDas ist Unterdrücken.
ENAnd when you bottle up your emotions, eventually the bottle explodes.
DeutschUnd wenn du deine Emotionen unterdrückst, explodiert die Flasche irgendwann.
ENWe have a phrasal verb for that explosion, too.
DeutschWir haben auch ein Phrasal Verb für diese Explosion.
ENIt is to lash out.
DeutschEs ist ausrasten.
ENTo lash out, this means to suddenly attack someone verbally because you are angry.
DeutschAusrasten bedeutet, plötzlich jemanden verbal anzugreifen, weil du wütend bist.
ENImagine you bottled up your stress from work all day.
DeutschStell dir vor, du hast deinen Stress von der Arbeit den ganzen Tag unterdrückt.
ENThen you come home and your husband asks, "What is for dinner?"
DeutschDann kommst du nach Hause und dein Mann fragt: "Was gibt es zum Abendessen?"
ENAnd you scream, "Why do you always ask me that?"
DeutschUnd du schreist: "Warum fragst du mich immer das?"
ENYou lashed out at him.
DeutschDu bist an ihm ausgelassen.
ENAnd usually, you lash out at the people you love the most.
DeutschUnd normalerweise lässt du dich bei den Menschen aus, die du am meisten liebst.
ENThis damages relationships.
DeutschDas schadet Beziehungen.
ENSo, the opposite of bottling up is to open up.
DeutschDas Gegenteil von Unterdrücken ist sich öffnen.
ENTo open up.
DeutschSich öffnen.
ENThis means to start talking about your inner world.
DeutschDas bedeutet, über deine innere Welt zu sprechen.
ENOpening up requires vulnerability, but it builds trust.
DeutschSich öffnen erfordert Verletzlichkeit, aber es schafft Vertrauen.
ENI have a question for you, Rose.
DeutschIch habe eine Frage an dich, Rose.
ENIs there a physical benefit to opening up?
DeutschGibt es einen körperlichen Vorteil, sich zu öffnen?
ENAbsolutely.
DeutschAbsolut.
ENWhen you bottle up, your cortisol levels, the stress hormone, go up.
DeutschWenn du unterdrückst, steigen deine Cortisolwerte, das Stresshormon.
ENWhen you open up, your brain releases oxytocin.
DeutschWenn du dich öffnest, schüttet dein Gehirn Oxytocin aus.
ENThat is the bonding chemical.
DeutschDas ist das Bindungshormon.
ENSo, speaking English is actually good for your health?
DeutschAlso ist Englisch sprechen tatsächlich gut für deine Gesundheit?
ENOnly if you tell the truth.
DeutschNur wenn du die Wahrheit sagst.
ENListeners, I want you to shadow this sentence with me to practice the phrasal verb.
DeutschZuhörer, ich möchte, dass ihr diesen Satz mit mir nachsprecht, um das Phrasal Verb zu üben.
ENRepeat after me.
DeutschWiederholt nach mir.
ENI need to open up because I cannot bottle this up anymore.
DeutschIch muss mich öffnen, weil ich das nicht mehr unterdrücken kann.
ENLet's try one more time. Don't lash out. Just try to open up.
DeutschLass es uns noch einmal versuchen. Lass nicht aus, versuche einfach, dich zu öffnen.
ENPart three, how to confront someone.
DeutschTeil drei, wie man jemanden konfrontiert.
ENOkay, we know we should open up.
DeutschOkay, wir wissen, dass wir uns öffnen sollten.
ENBut what if the feeling is caused by another person?
DeutschAber was ist, wenn das Gefühl von einer anderen Person verursacht wird?
ENThis is the hard part.
DeutschDas ist der schwierige Teil.
ENMany learners stay silent because they are afraid to be rude.
DeutschViele Lernende bleiben still, weil sie Angst haben, unhöflich zu sein.
ENRose, is there a psychological trick to confront someone without fighting?
DeutschRose, gibt es einen psychologischen Trick, um jemanden zu konfrontieren, ohne zu kämpfen?
ENYes, there is a classic tool we use.
DeutschJa, es gibt ein klassisches Werkzeug, das wir verwenden.
ENIt is called the I statement.
DeutschEs heißt die Ich-Botschaft.
ENThe I statement.
DeutschDie Ich-Botschaft.
ENCan you explain how that works?
DeutschKannst du erklären, wie das funktioniert?
ENUsually when we confront someone, we use you statements.
DeutschNormalerweise verwenden wir, wenn wir jemanden konfrontieren, Du-Botschaften.
ENWe say, "You are rude," or, "You never listen to me."
DeutschWir sagen: "Du bist unhöflich" oder "Du hörst mir nie zu."
ENThat sounds like an attack.
DeutschDas klingt wie ein Angriff.
ENAnd when I hear, "You never listen," I want to defend myself.
DeutschUnd wenn ich höre: "Du hörst nie zu", möchte ich mich verteidigen.
ENExactly.
DeutschGenau.
ENInstead, you should focus on your own feeling.
DeutschStattdessen solltest du dich auf dein eigenes Gefühl konzentrieren.
ENThe formula is, "I feel when you..."
DeutschDie Formel ist: "Ich fühle mich, wenn du..."
ENLet's look at the grammar of that.
DeutschSchauen wir uns die Grammatik davon an.
ENWrite I feel followed by an adjective.
DeutschSchreibe Ich fühle gefolgt von einem Adjektiv.
ENSpeaking very slowly, when you, followed by a verb.
DeutschSprich sehr langsam, wenn du, gefolgt von einem Verb.
ENSo instead of saying, "You are annoying," what should I say, Rose?
DeutschAlso anstatt zu sagen: "Du bist nervig", was sollte ich sagen, Rose?
ENYou could say, "I feel frustrated when you interrupt me."
DeutschDu könntest sagen: "Ich fühle mich frustriert, wenn du mich unterbrichst."
ENNotice the difference.
DeutschBeachte den Unterschied.
ENYou are not saying the person is bad.
DeutschDu sagst nicht, dass die Person schlecht ist.
ENYou are saying the action produces a feeling in you.
DeutschDu sagst, dass die Handlung ein Gefühl in dir hervorruft.
ENLet's practice some other examples.
DeutschLass uns einige andere Beispiele üben.
ENImagine your friend is always late.
DeutschStell dir vor, dein Freund ist immer zu spät.
ENDo not say, "You are so disrespectful."
DeutschSag nicht: "Du bist so respektlos."
ENThat will start a fight.
DeutschDas wird einen Streit anfangen.
ENInstead say, "I feel hurt when you arrive late because it feels like my time is not important."
DeutschSag stattdessen: "Ich fühle mich verletzt, wenn du zu spät kommst, weil es sich anfühlt, als wäre meine Zeit nicht wichtig."
ENYou added the because, which explains the impact.
DeutschDu hast das weil hinzugefügt, was die Auswirkungen erklärt.
ENThis invites the other person to understand you, not fight you.
DeutschDas lädt die andere Person ein, dich zu verstehen, nicht zu kämpfen.
ENIs it really that simple?
DeutschIst es wirklich so einfach?
ENSimple to say, but hard to do.
DeutschEinfach zu sagen, aber schwer zu tun.
ENIt requires you to know your feeling first.
DeutschEs erfordert, dass du zuerst dein Gefühl kennst.
ENWe also have a great expression for this moment of honesty.
DeutschWir haben auch einen großartigen Ausdruck für diesen Moment der Ehrlichkeit.
ENIt is to get something off your chest.
DeutschEs ist, etwas von der Seele zu reden.
ENImagine a heavy weight sitting on your chest.
DeutschStell dir ein schweres Gewicht auf deiner Brust vor.
ENYou cannot breathe well.
DeutschDu kannst nicht gut atmen.
ENWhen you finally say the truth, the weight is gone.
DeutschWenn du endlich die Wahrheit sagst, ist das Gewicht verschwunden.
ENYou got it off your chest.
DeutschDu hast es von der Seele geredet.
ENRose, how do patients feel after they get it off their chest?
DeutschRose, wie fühlen sich Patienten, nachdem sie es von der Seele geredet haben?
ENThey often sigh with relief, "Oh." They feel lighter.
DeutschSie seufzen oft erleichtert: "Oh." Sie fühlen sich leichter.
ENThey realize the fear was in their head.
DeutschSie erkennen, dass die Angst in ihrem Kopf war.
ENSo, listeners, if you are holding a heavy secret or a frustration, use the structure, "I feel X when you do Y."
DeutschAlso, Zuhörer, wenn ihr ein schweres Geheimnis oder eine Frustration habt, verwendet die Struktur: "Ich fühle X, wenn du Y tust."
ENPart four, asking about feelings.
DeutschTeil vier, nach Gefühlen fragen.
ENWe have talked about expressing ourselves.
DeutschWir haben darüber gesprochen, uns auszudrücken.
ENBut a conversation is a two-way street.
DeutschAber ein Gespräch ist eine Einbahnstraße.
ENWe need to ask other people how they feel.
DeutschWir müssen andere Menschen fragen, wie sie sich fühlen.
ENAnd, "How are you?" is not enough.
DeutschUnd, "Wie geht es dir?" reicht nicht aus.
EN"How are you?" is automatic.
Deutsch"Wie geht es dir?" ist automatisch.
ENIt is a reflex, not a question.
DeutschEs ist ein Reflex, keine Frage.
ENRose, how can we ask a question that invites a real answer?
DeutschRose, wie können wir eine Frage stellen, die eine echte Antwort einlädt?
ENYou need to ask specific open-ended questions.
DeutschDu musst spezifische offene Fragen stellen.
ENInstead of, "Are you okay?" which is a yes/no question,
DeutschAnstatt zu fragen: "Geht es dir gut?", was eine Ja/Nein-Frage ist,
ENtry asking, "What is on your mind?"
Deutschversuche zu fragen: "Was beschäftigt dich?"
EN"What is on your mind?"
Deutsch"Was beschäftigt dich?"
ENThat is a beautiful phrase.
DeutschDas ist eine schöne Phrase.
ENIt implies that you know the person is thinking about something.
DeutschEs impliziert, dass du weißt, dass die Person über etwas nachdenkt.
ENAnother great one is, "You seem a bit quiet today."
DeutschEine weitere großartige Frage ist: "Du scheinst heute ein bisschen still zu sein."
ENThat is an observation, not a question, but it invites an answer.
DeutschDas ist eine Beobachtung, keine Frage, aber sie lädt zu einer Antwort ein.
EN"You seem quiet, is everything okay?" Yes, observing body language is key.
Deutsch"Du scheinst still zu sein, ist alles in Ordnung?" Ja, die Körpersprache zu beobachten ist entscheidend.
ENIf you see someone looking down or sighing, you can say, "I notice you are sighing a lot.
DeutschWenn du siehst, dass jemand niedergeschlagen aussieht oder seufzt, kannst du sagen: "Ich bemerke, dass du viel seufzt.
ENDo you want to talk about it?"
DeutschMöchtest du darüber sprechen?"
ENThis gives the other person permission to open up.
DeutschDas gibt der anderen Person die Erlaubnis, sich zu öffnen.
ENOr permission to stay silent.
DeutschOder die Erlaubnis, still zu bleiben.
ENIt is very respectful.
DeutschEs ist sehr respektvoll.
ENRose, what if the person starts crying?
DeutschRose, was ist, wenn die Person anfängt zu weinen?
ENMany English learners panic if someone cries.
DeutschViele Englischlerner geraten in Panik, wenn jemand weint.
ENThey do not know what to say.
DeutschSie wissen nicht, was sie sagen sollen.
ENThe best thing to say is often very simple.
DeutschDas Beste, was man oft sagen kann, ist sehr einfach.
ENYou can say, "It is okay to cry," or, "I am here with you."
DeutschDu kannst sagen: "Es ist okay zu weinen" oder "Ich bin hier bei dir."
EN"I am here with you."
Deutsch"Ich bin hier bei dir."
ENYou do not need to fix the problem.
DeutschDu musst das Problem nicht lösen.
ENYou just need to be present.
DeutschDu musst einfach nur präsent sein.
ENWe also use the verb 'to empathize'.
DeutschWir verwenden auch das Verb 'empathisieren'.
ENTo empathize means to feel what the other person is feeling.
DeutschEmpathisieren bedeutet, zu fühlen, was die andere Person fühlt.
ENIt is different from sympathize.
DeutschEs ist anders als Mitleid haben.
ENSympathy is feeling sorry for someone.
DeutschMitleid ist, sich für jemanden leid zu tun.
ENEmpathy
DeutschEmpathie
ENis feeling with someone.
Deutschist mit jemandem zu fühlen.
ENThat is a crucial distinction.
DeutschDas ist eine entscheidende Unterscheidung.
ENConnection comes from empathy.
DeutschVerbindung kommt von Empathie.
ENWhen you say, "I can imagine how hard that is," you are empathizing.
DeutschWenn du sagst: "Ich kann mir vorstellen, wie schwer das ist", empathisierst du.
ENListeners, these phrases are your lifeline in deep conversations.
DeutschZuhörer, diese Phrasen sind eure Lebenslinie in tiefen Gesprächen.
EN"I can imagine how hard that is."
Deutsch"Ich kann mir vorstellen, wie schwer das ist."
EN"Thank you for trusting me with this."
Deutsch"Danke, dass du mir das anvertraut hast."
EN"I appreciate you telling me."
Deutsch"Ich schätze es, dass du mir das gesagt hast."
ENThese are much better than just saying, "Don't worry!" Please, never say, "Don't worry," to someone in pain.
DeutschDiese sind viel besser, als einfach zu sagen: "Mach dir keine Sorgen!" Bitte sag niemals: "Mach dir keine Sorgen!" zu jemandem, der leidet.
ENIt invalidates their feelings.
DeutschEs entwertet ihre Gefühle.
ENIt tells them their feeling is wrong.
DeutschEs sagt ihnen, dass ihr Gefühl falsch ist.
ENWhite: Instead, validate them.
DeutschStattdessen, validiere sie.
ENSay, "It makes sense that you are sad."
DeutschSag: "Es macht Sinn, dass du traurig bist."
ENPart 5, The Emotional Toolbox.
DeutschTeil 5, Der emotionale Werkzeugkasten.
ENWe have covered a lot of ground today.
DeutschWir haben heute viel besprochen.
ENWe moved from, "I am fine," to, "I am overwhelmed."
DeutschWir sind von "Es geht mir gut" zu "Ich bin überwältigt" übergegangen.
ENWe learned to stop bottling up and start opening up.
DeutschWir haben gelernt, das Unterdrücken zu stoppen und uns zu öffnen.
ENWe learned to get things off our chest using 'I' statements.
DeutschWir haben gelernt, Dinge von der Seele zu reden, indem wir Ich-Botschaften verwenden.
ENAnd we learned how to offer empathy.
DeutschUnd wir haben gelernt, wie man Empathie anbietet.
ENRose, as we finish, what is your final advice for our listeners?
DeutschRose, während wir abschließen, was ist dein letzter Rat für unsere Zuhörer?
ENMy advice is to practice with small feelings first.
DeutschMein Rat ist, zuerst mit kleinen Gefühlen zu üben.
ENDo not wait for a big tragedy.
DeutschWarte nicht auf eine große Tragödie.
ENPractice telling a friend, "I felt a bit disappointed when the restaurant was closed." Practice the small muscles of vulnerability.
DeutschÜbe, einem Freund zu sagen: "Ich war ein bisschen enttäuscht, als das Restaurant geschlossen war." Übe die kleinen Muskeln der Verletzlichkeit.
ENThen, when the big feelings come, you will be ready.
DeutschDann, wenn die großen Gefühle kommen, wirst du bereit sein.
ENThat is excellent advice.
DeutschDas ist ein ausgezeichneter Rat.
ENStart small to build strength.
DeutschFange klein an, um Stärke aufzubauen.
ENLanguage learning is exactly the same.
DeutschSprachenlernen ist genau dasselbe.
ENYou practice small sentences so you can have big conversations.
DeutschDu übst kleine Sätze, damit du große Gespräche führen kannst.
ENRose, thank you so much for joining us and sharing your wisdom.
DeutschRose, vielen Dank, dass du bei uns warst und deine Weisheit geteilt hast.
ENThank you for having me.
DeutschDanke, dass ich hier sein durfte.
ENIt was a pleasure.
DeutschEs war mir ein Vergnügen.
ENIt is amazing how psychology and language go hand-in-hand.
DeutschEs ist erstaunlich, wie Psychologie und Sprache Hand in Hand gehen.
ENThey are both about understanding the human experience.
DeutschBeide drehen sich um das Verständnis der menschlichen Erfahrung.
ENRemember, your English does not have to be perfect to be emotional.
DeutschDenke daran, dein Englisch muss nicht perfekt sein, um emotional zu sein.
ENPeople connect with your heart, not your grammar.
DeutschMenschen verbinden sich mit deinem Herzen, nicht mit deiner Grammatik.
ENBut correct grammar helps.
DeutschAber korrekte Grammatik hilft.
ENYes, it certainly helps.
DeutschJa, das hilft auf jeden Fall.
ENConclusion.
DeutschFazit.
ENBefore we go, I want to ask you one quick favor.
DeutschBevor wir gehen, möchte ich dich um einen kleinen Gefallen bitten.
ENIf you enjoyed this episode, please write a small comment before you go.
DeutschWenn dir diese Episode gefallen hat, schreibe bitte einen kleinen Kommentar, bevor du gehst.
ENYour comments show the platforms that our community is real, active, and growing.
DeutschDeine Kommentare zeigen den Plattformen, dass unsere Gemeinschaft echt, aktiv und wachsend ist.
ENThis support is crucial for us to continue creating new episodes every week.
DeutschDiese Unterstützung ist entscheidend für uns, um weiterhin jede Woche neue Episoden zu erstellen.
ENTell us how you are feeling today using one of the new words we learned.
DeutschSag uns, wie du dich heute fühlst, indem du eines der neuen Wörter verwendest, die wir gelernt haben.
ENAre you feeling motivated?
DeutschFühlst du dich motiviert?
ENOverwhelmed?
DeutschÜberwältigt?
ENOr perhaps relieved?
DeutschOder vielleicht erleichtert?
ENWe need your comments because your voice is more important than ours.
DeutschWir brauchen deine Kommentare, denn deine Stimme ist wichtiger als unsere.
ENYour voice and comments will show us the right path.
DeutschDeine Stimme und Kommentare werden uns den richtigen Weg zeigen.
ENThank you for listening.
DeutschDanke fürs Zuhören.
ENSee you in the next episode.
DeutschWir sehen uns in der nächsten Episode.
Line by line: one English sentence, then its فارسی translation —
clearly separated, each with its own lang markup.
ENTalk about your feelings.
فارسیدر مورد احساساتت صحبت کن.
ENWelcome to Your English Toolbox, your slow English podcast where we train your ears step-by-step.
فارسیبه ابزار زبان انگلیسی خود خوش آمدید، پادکست زبان انگلیسی کند که در آن گوشهای شما را مرحله به مرحله آموزش میدهیم.
ENI am Martin.
فارسیمن مارتین هستم.
ENAnd I am Julia.
فارسیو من جولیا هستم.
ENHow are you today?
فارسیامروز حالت چطور است؟
ENAre you really fine?
فارسیواقعا خوب هستی؟
ENWell, actually, I am a little bit tired and stressed about a project.
فارسیخب، در واقع، من کمی خسته و نگران یک پروژه هستم.
ENSee, that is the problem with English learners and even native speakers.
فارسیببین، این مشکل زبانآموزان انگلیسی و حتی سخنرانان بومی است.
ENWe always say, "I am fine," because we are afraid to show our real emotions.
فارسیما همیشه میگوییم، "من خوبم،" چون از نشان دادن احساسات واقعیمان میترسیم.
ENBut language is a tool for connection.
فارسیاما زبان ابزاری برای ارتباط است.
ENIf you cannot express sadness, frustration, or joy, you are only using half of your toolbox.
فارسیاگر نتوانید غم، ناامیدی یا شادی را بیان کنید، فقط از نیمی از ابزار خود استفاده میکنید.
ENToday, we are going to go deep.
فارسیامروز، ما عمیقتر خواهیم رفت.
ENWe will learn how to talk about difficult feelings.
فارسیما یاد خواهیم گرفت که چگونه در مورد احساسات دشوار صحبت کنیم.
ENWe will learn how to confront people politely.
فارسیما یاد خواهیم گرفت که چگونه به طور مودبانه با مردم مواجه شویم.
ENAnd we have a very special guest to help us understand why this is so important.
فارسیو یک مهمان بسیار ویژه داریم که به ما کمک میکند بفهمیم چرا این موضوع اینقدر مهم است.
ENPlease welcome Rose, a psychologist who joins us today.
فارسیلطفا از رز، روانشناس که امروز به ما پیوسته، استقبال کنید.
ENHello, Martin.
فارسیسلام، مارتین.
ENHello, Julia.
فارسیسلام، جولیا.
ENIt is wonderful to be here.
فارسیخوشحالم که اینجا هستم.
ENWe are so happy to have you, Rose.
فارسیما خیلی خوشحالیم که شما اینجا هستید، رز.
ENRose, why is it so hard for people to say, "I am sad," or, "I am angry"?
فارسیرز، چرا برای مردم سخت است که بگویند، "من ناراحتم" یا "من عصبانی هستم"؟
ENIt is often because we think negative feelings are bad.
فارسیاین اغلب به این دلیل است که ما فکر میکنیم احساسات منفی بد هستند.
ENWe think we must be happy all the time to be accepted.
فارسیما فکر میکنیم باید همیشه خوشحال باشیم تا پذیرفته شویم.
ENBut from a psychological perspective, ignoring feelings is dangerous.
فارسیاما از دیدگاه روانشناسی، نادیده گرفتن احساسات خطرناک است.
ENThat is a great hook for our listeners.
فارسیاین یک نکته عالی برای شنوندگان ماست.
ENSo, are you ready to stop saying, "I am fine," and start speaking the truth?
فارسیپس آیا آمادهاید که دیگر نگویید، "من خوبم" و شروع به گفتن حقیقت کنید؟
ENLet's open Your English Toolbox.
فارسیبیایید ابزار زبان انگلیسی خود را باز کنیم.
ENPart 1: Identifying the Feeling.
فارسیبخش ۱: شناسایی احساس.
ENBefore we can talk, we must identify the word.
فارسیقبل از اینکه بتوانیم صحبت کنیم، باید کلمه را شناسایی کنیم.
ENMany students only use happy, sad, or angry.
فارسیبسیاری از دانشآموزان فقط از خوشحال، ناراحت یا عصبانی استفاده میکنند.
ENBut English has thousands of nuances.
فارسیاما انگلیسی هزاران نوانس دارد.
ENRose, in your therapy sessions, what is the first step?
فارسیرز، در جلسات درمانی شما، اولین قدم چیست؟
ENThe first step is to name the emotion accurately.
فارسیاولین قدم این است که احساس را به درستی نامگذاری کنید.
ENThere is a big difference between being angry and being frustrated.
فارسیتفاوت بزرگی بین عصبانی بودن و ناامید بودن وجود دارد.
ENLet's look at that difference.
فارسیبیایید به آن تفاوت نگاه کنیم.
ENAngry is a strong, hot feeling of displeasure.
فارسیعصبانی یک احساس قوی و داغ از نارضایتی است.
ENFor example, if I cannot find my keys, I am frustrated.
فارسیبرای مثال، اگر نتوانم کلیدهایم را پیدا کنم، ناامید هستم.
ENIf someone steals my keys, I am angry.
فارسیاگر کسی کلیدهایم را بدزدد، عصبانی میشوم.
ENThat is a very clear distinction.
فارسیاین یک تمایز بسیار واضح است.
ENRose, why does accuracy matter here?
فارسیرز، چرا دقت در اینجا مهم است؟
ENWe call this, "Name it to tame it."
فارسیما این را "نامش کن تا آن را کنترل کنی" مینامیم.
ENIf you say, "I am overwhelmed," you admit you have too much pressure.
فارسیاگر بگویید، "من تحت فشار هستم،" اعتراف میکنید که فشار زیادی دارید.
ENOverwhelmed,
فارسیتحت فشار،
ENthat is a fantastic B2-level word.
فارسیاین یک کلمه فوقالعاده در سطح B2 است.
ENIt means you have too much work or too much emotion to handle.
فارسیاین به این معنی است که شما کار یا احساسات زیادی برای مدیریت دارید.
ENListeners, are you feeling overwhelmed with your English study sometimes?
فارسیشنوندگان، آیا گاهی اوقات در مطالعه زبان انگلیسی خود تحت فشار هستید؟
ENEncouraging, speaking very slowly, it is okay to admit it.
فارسیتشویقکننده، به آرامی صحبت کنید، اشکالی ندارد که به آن اعتراف کنید.
ENAnother great word is anxious.
فارسییک کلمه عالی دیگر، مضطرب است.
ENHow is that different from afraid, Julia?
فارسیاین با ترس چگونه متفاوت است، جولیا؟
ENAfraid is usually about a real danger right now, like a lion.
فارسیترس معمولاً درباره یک خطر واقعی در حال حاضر است، مانند یک شیر.
ENAnxious is about something in the future like a job interview.
فارسیمضطرب درباره چیزی در آینده است، مانند یک مصاحبه شغلی.
ENExactly.
فارسیدقیقاً.
ENAnxiety lives in the future.
فارسیاضطراب در آینده زندگی میکند.
ENWhen you tell a friend, "I am feeling anxious about tomorrow," you invite them to help you.
فارسیوقتی به دوستی میگویید، "من در مورد فردا مضطرب هستم،" از او دعوت میکنید که به شما کمک کند.
ENSo rule number one is precision.
فارسیپس قانون شماره یک دقت است.
ENStop using bad, and start using frustrated, overwhelmed, or anxious.
فارسیاستفاده از بد را متوقف کنید و شروع به استفاده از ناامید، تحت فشار یا مضطرب کنید.
ENPart 2: The Danger of Bottling Up.
فارسیبخش ۲: خطر دروننگهداشتن.
ENNow we need some phrasal verbs.
فارسیحالا به چند فعل حرکتی نیاز داریم.
ENRose, what happens if we do not speak about our emotions?
فارسیرز، اگر درباره احساساتمان صحبت نکنیم، چه اتفاقی میافتد؟
ENWell, if you do not speak, you tend to bottle up your feelings.
فارسیخب، اگر صحبت نکنید، تمایل دارید احساساتتان را درون نگه دارید.
ENTo bottle up.
فارسیدرون نگهداشتن.
ENImagine a bottle of soda.
فارسییک بطری نوشابه را تصور کنید.
ENYou shake it and shake it, but you keep the cap on tight.
فارسیشما آن را تکان میدهید و تکان میدهید، اما درب آن را محکم میبندید.
ENYou are putting the feelings inside a bottle and closing it.
فارسیشما احساسات را درون یک بطری قرار میدهید و آن را میبندید.
ENThat is bottling up.
فارسیاین درون نگهداشتن است.
ENAnd when you bottle up your emotions, eventually the bottle explodes.
فارسیو وقتی احساساتتان را درون نگه میدارید، در نهایت بطری منفجر میشود.
ENWe have a phrasal verb for that explosion, too.
فارسیما یک فعل حرکتی برای آن انفجار هم داریم.
ENIt is to lash out.
فارسیاین "به کسی حمله کردن" است.
ENTo lash out, this means to suddenly attack someone verbally because you are angry.
فارسیبه کسی حمله کردن، به این معنی است که ناگهان به کسی به صورت کلامی حمله کنید چون عصبانی هستید.
ENImagine you bottled up your stress from work all day.
فارسیتصور کنید که تمام روز استرس کار را درون نگه داشتهاید.
ENThen you come home and your husband asks, "What is for dinner?"
فارسیسپس به خانه میروید و همسرتان میپرسد، "برای شام چه داریم؟"
ENAnd you scream, "Why do you always ask me that?"
فارسیو شما فریاد میزنید، "چرا همیشه از من این را میپرسی؟"
ENYou lashed out at him.
فارسیشما به او حمله کردید.
ENAnd usually, you lash out at the people you love the most.
فارسیو معمولاً، شما به افرادی که بیشتر دوست دارید حمله میکنید.
ENThis damages relationships.
فارسیاین به روابط آسیب میزند.
ENSo, the opposite of bottling up is to open up.
فارسیپس، برعکس درون نگهداشتن، باز کردن است.
ENTo open up.
فارسیباز کردن.
ENThis means to start talking about your inner world.
فارسیاین به این معنی است که شروع به صحبت درباره دنیای درونیتان کنید.
ENOpening up requires vulnerability, but it builds trust.
فارسیباز کردن نیاز به آسیبپذیری دارد، اما اعتماد را میسازد.
ENI have a question for you, Rose.
فارسیمن یک سوال برای شما دارم، رز.
ENIs there a physical benefit to opening up?
فارسیآیا فایده فیزیکی برای باز کردن وجود دارد؟
ENAbsolutely.
فارسیکاملاً.
ENWhen you bottle up, your cortisol levels, the stress hormone, go up.
فارسیوقتی درون نگه میدارید، سطح کورتیزول شما، هورمون استرس، بالا میرود.
ENWhen you open up, your brain releases oxytocin.
فارسیوقتی باز میکنید، مغز شما اکسیتوسین آزاد میکند.
ENThat is the bonding chemical.
فارسیاین ماده شیمیایی پیوندی است.
ENSo, speaking English is actually good for your health?
فارسیپس، صحبت کردن به زبان انگلیسی واقعاً برای سلامتی شما خوب است؟
ENOnly if you tell the truth.
فارسیفقط اگر حقیقت را بگویید.
ENListeners, I want you to shadow this sentence with me to practice the phrasal verb.
فارسیشنوندگان، میخواهم این جمله را با من تکرار کنید تا فعل حرکتی را تمرین کنید.
ENRepeat after me.
فارسیبعد از من تکرار کنید.
ENI need to open up because I cannot bottle this up anymore.
فارسیمن باید باز کنم چون نمیتوانم این را بیشتر درون نگه دارم.
ENLet's try one more time.
فارسیبیایید یک بار دیگر امتحان کنیم.
ENDon't lash out.
فارسیبه کسی حمله نکنید.
ENJust try to open up.
فارسیفقط سعی کنید باز کنید.
ENPart three, how to confront someone.
فارسیبخش سه، چگونه با کسی مواجه شویم.
ENOkay, we know we should open up.
فارسیخوب، میدانیم که باید باز کنیم.
ENBut what if the feeling is caused by another person?
فارسیاما اگر احساس ناشی از یک شخص دیگر باشد چه؟
ENThis is the hard part.
فارسیاین قسمت سخت است.
ENMany learners stay silent because they are afraid to be rude.
فارسیبسیاری از زبانآموزان سکوت میکنند چون از بیادبی میترسند.
ENRose, is there a psychological trick to confront someone without fighting?
فارسیرز، آیا یک ترفند روانشناسی برای مواجهه با کسی بدون دعوا وجود دارد؟
ENYes, there is a classic tool we use.
فارسیبله، یک ابزار کلاسیک داریم که استفاده میکنیم.
ENIt is called the I statement.
فارسیبه آن "بیانیه من" میگوییم.
ENThe I statement.
فارسیبیانیه من.
ENCan you explain how that works?
فارسیآیا میتوانید توضیح دهید که چگونه کار میکند؟
ENUsually when we confront someone, we use you statements.
فارسیمعمولاً وقتی با کسی مواجه میشویم، از بیانیههای شما استفاده میکنیم.
ENWe say, "You are rude," or, "You never listen to me."
فارسیمیگوییم، "شما بیادب هستید،" یا "شما هرگز به من گوش نمیدهید."
ENThat sounds like an attack.
فارسیاین به نظر یک حمله میآید.
ENAnd when I hear, "You never listen," I want to defend myself.
فارسیو وقتی میشنوم، "شما هرگز گوش نمیدهید،" میخواهم از خودم دفاع کنم.
ENExactly.
فارسیدقیقاً.
ENInstead, you should focus on your own feeling.
فارسیبه جای آن، باید بر روی احساس خود تمرکز کنید.
ENThe formula is, "I feel when you..."
فارسیفرمول این است، "من احساس میکنم وقتی شما..."
ENLet's look at the grammar of that.
فارسیبیایید به گرامر آن نگاه کنیم.
ENWrite I feel followed by an adjective.
فارسیبنویسید "من احساس میکنم" و سپس یک صفت.
ENSpeaking very slowly, when you, followed by a verb.
فارسیبه آرامی صحبت کنید، "وقتی شما" و سپس یک فعل.
ENSo instead of saying, "You are annoying," what should I say, Rose?
فارسیپس به جای گفتن، "شما آزاردهنده هستید،" چه باید بگویم، رز؟
ENYou could say, "I feel frustrated when you interrupt me."
فارسیمیتوانید بگویید، "من احساس ناامیدی میکنم وقتی شما صحبت مرا قطع میکنید."
ENNotice the difference.
فارسیتفاوت را متوجه شوید.
ENYou are not saying the person is bad.
فارسیشما نمیگویید که آن شخص بد است.
ENYou are saying the action produces a feeling in you.
فارسیشما میگویید که عمل او احساسی در شما ایجاد میکند.
ENLet's practice some other examples.
فارسیبیایید چند مثال دیگر تمرین کنیم.
ENImagine your friend is always late.
فارسیتصور کنید دوست شما همیشه دیر میآید.
ENDo not say, "You are so disrespectful."
فارسینگویید، "شما خیلی بیاحترامی."
ENThat will start a fight.
فارسیاین یک دعوا را شروع میکند.
ENInstead say, "I feel hurt when you arrive late because it feels like my time is not important."
فارسیبه جای آن بگویید، "من احساس ناراحتی میکنم وقتی شما دیر میرسید چون احساس میکنم زمان من مهم نیست."
ENYou added the because, which explains the impact.
فارسیشما "چون" را اضافه کردید که تأثیر را توضیح میدهد.
ENThis invites the other person to understand you, not fight you.
فارسیاین دعوت میکند که شخص دیگر شما را درک کند، نه اینکه با شما بجنگد.
ENIs it really that simple?
فارسیآیا واقعاً به این سادگی است؟
ENSimple to say, but hard to do.
فارسیساده گفتن، اما سخت انجام دادن.
ENIt requires you to know your feeling first.
فارسیاین نیاز به این دارد که اول احساس خود را بشناسید.
ENWe also have a great expression for this moment of honesty.
فارسیما همچنین یک عبارت عالی برای این لحظه صداقت داریم.
ENIt is to get something off your chest.
فارسیاین "چیزی را از سینهات بیرون آوردن" است.
ENImagine a heavy weight sitting on your chest.
فارسیتصور کنید وزنه سنگینی روی سینهتان نشسته است.
ENYou cannot breathe well.
فارسیشما نمیتوانید به خوبی نفس بکشید.
ENWhen you finally say the truth, the weight is gone.
فارسیوقتی بالاخره حقیقت را میگویید، آن وزن از بین میرود.
ENYou got it off your chest.
فارسیشما آن را از سینهتان بیرون آوردید.
ENRose, how do patients feel after they get it off their chest?
فارسیرز، بیماران بعد از اینکه این را از سینهشان بیرون میآورند، چگونه احساس میکنند؟
ENThey often sigh with relief, "Oh." They feel lighter.
فارسیآنها معمولاً با آسودگی نفس میکشند، "آه." آنها احساس سبکی میکنند.
ENThey realize the fear was in their head.
فارسیآنها متوجه میشوند که ترس در ذهنشان بوده است.
ENSo, listeners, if you are holding a heavy secret or a frustration, use the structure, "I feel X when you do Y."
فارسیبنابراین، شنوندگان، اگر یک راز سنگین یا ناامیدی را درون نگه داشتهاید، از ساختار "من احساس X میکنم وقتی شما Y میکنید" استفاده کنید.
ENPart four, asking about feelings.
فارسیبخش چهار، پرسیدن در مورد احساسات.
ENWe have talked about expressing ourselves.
فارسیما در مورد بیان خود صحبت کردهایم.
ENBut a conversation is a two-way street.
فارسیاما یک مکالمه یک خیابان دو طرفه است.
ENWe need to ask other people how they feel.
فارسیما باید از دیگران بپرسیم که آنها چگونه احساس میکنند.
ENAnd, "How are you?" is not enough.
فارسیو، "حالت چطور است؟" کافی نیست.
EN"How are you?" is automatic.
فارسی"حالت چطور است؟" خودکار است.
ENIt is a reflex, not a question.
فارسیاین یک واکنش است، نه یک سوال.
ENRose, how can we ask a question that invites a real answer?
فارسیرز، چگونه میتوانیم سوالی بپرسیم که دعوت به پاسخ واقعی کند؟
ENYou need to ask specific open-ended questions.
فارسیشما باید سوالات خاص و باز بپرسید.
ENInstead of, "Are you okay?" which is a yes/no question,
فارسیبه جای "آیا خوب هستید؟" که یک سوال بله/خیر است،
ENtry asking, "What is on your mind?"
فارسیسعی کنید بپرسید، "در ذهن شما چه میگذرد؟"
EN"What is on your mind?"
فارسی"در ذهن شما چه میگذرد؟"
ENThat is a beautiful phrase.
فارسیاین یک عبارت زیبا است.
ENIt implies that you know the person is thinking about something.
فارسیاین نشان میدهد که شما میدانید شخص در حال فکر کردن به چیزی است.
ENAnother great one is, "You seem a bit quiet today."
فارسییک عبارت عالی دیگر این است، "شما امروز کمی ساکت به نظر میرسید."
ENThat is an observation, not a question, but it invites an answer.
فارسیاین یک مشاهده است، نه یک سوال، اما دعوت به پاسخ میکند.
EN"You seem quiet, is everything okay?" Yes, observing body language is key.
فارسی"شما ساکت به نظر میرسید، آیا همه چیز خوب است؟" بله، مشاهده زبان بدن کلیدی است.
ENIf you see someone looking down or sighing, you can say, "I notice you are sighing a lot.
فارسیاگر ببینید کسی ناراحت یا آه میکشد، میتوانید بگویید، "متوجه شدم که شما زیاد آه میکشید.
ENDo you want to talk about it?"
فارسیآیا میخواهید در مورد آن صحبت کنید؟"
ENThis gives the other person permission to open up.
فارسیاین به شخص دیگر اجازه میدهد که باز شود.
ENOr permission to stay silent.
فارسییا اجازه میدهد که سکوت کند.
ENIt is very respectful.
فارسیاین بسیار محترمانه است.
ENRose, what if the person starts crying?
فارسیرز، اگر شخص شروع به گریه کند چه؟
ENMany English learners panic if someone cries.
فارسیبسیاری از زبانآموزان انگلیسی در صورتی که کسی گریه کند، وحشت میکنند.
ENThey do not know what to say.
فارسیآنها نمیدانند چه بگویند.
ENThe best thing to say is often very simple.
فارسیبهترین چیزی که میتوان گفت معمولاً بسیار ساده است.
ENYou can say, "It is okay to cry," or, "I am here with you."
فارسیشما میتوانید بگویید، "گریه کردن اشکالی ندارد،" یا، "من اینجا با شما هستم."
EN"I am here with you."
فارسی"من اینجا با شما هستم."
ENYou do not need to fix the problem.
فارسیشما نیازی به حل مشکل ندارید.
ENYou just need to be present.
فارسیشما فقط باید حاضر باشید.
ENWe also use the verb 'to empathize'.
فارسیما همچنین از فعل "همدلی کردن" استفاده میکنیم.
ENTo empathize means to feel what the other person is feeling.
فارسیهمدلی کردن به این معنی است که احساسات شخص دیگر را احساس کنید.
ENIt is different from sympathize.
فارسیاین با همدردی متفاوت است.
ENSympathy is feeling sorry for someone.
فارسیهمدردی یعنی برای کسی متاسف بودن.
ENEmpathy
فارسیهمدلی
ENis feeling with someone.
فارسییعنی با کسی احساس کردن.
ENThat is a crucial distinction.
فارسیاین یک تمایز حیاتی است.
ENConnection comes from empathy.
فارسیارتباط از همدلی ناشی میشود.
ENWhen you say, "I can imagine how hard that is," you are empathizing.
فارسیوقتی میگویید، "میتوانم تصور کنم چقدر سخت است،" شما همدلی میکنید.
ENListeners, these phrases are your lifeline in deep conversations.
فارسیشنوندگان، این عبارات در مکالمات عمیق، خط نجات شما هستند.
EN"I can imagine how hard that is."
فارسی"میتوانم تصور کنم چقدر سخت است."
EN"Thank you for trusting me with this."
فارسی"از اینکه این را با من در میان گذاشتید، متشکرم."
EN"I appreciate you telling me."
فارسی"از اینکه به من گفتید، قدردانی میکنم."
ENThese are much better than just saying, "Don't worry!" Please, never say, "Don't worry," to someone in pain.
فارسیاینها بسیار بهتر از فقط گفتن «نگران نباش!» است. لطفاً هرگز به کسی که در درد است نگوید «نگران نباش!»
ENIt invalidates their feelings.
فارسیاین احساسات آنها را بیاعتبار میکند.
ENIt tells them their feeling is wrong.
فارسیاین به آنها میگوید که احساسشان اشتباه است.
ENWhite: Instead, validate them.
فارسیسفید: به جای آن، آنها را تأیید کنید.
ENSay, "It makes sense that you are sad."
فارسیبگویید، "این منطقی است که شما ناراحت هستید."
ENPart 5, The Emotional Toolbox.
فارسیبخش ۵، جعبه ابزار احساسی.
ENWe have covered a lot of ground today.
فارسیما امروز زمین زیادی را پوشش دادیم.
ENWe moved from, "I am fine," to, "I am overwhelmed."
فارسیما از "من خوبم" به "من تحت فشار هستم" رفتیم.
ENWe learned to stop bottling up and start opening up.
فارسیما یاد گرفتیم که درون نگهداشتن را متوقف کنیم و شروع به باز کردن کنیم.
ENWe learned to get things off our chest using 'I' statements.
فارسیما یاد گرفتیم که چگونه چیزها را با استفاده از بیانیههای "من" از سینهمان بیرون بیاوریم.
ENAnd we learned how to offer empathy.
فارسیو ما یاد گرفتیم که چگونه همدلی کنیم.
ENRose, as we finish, what is your final advice for our listeners?
فارسیرز، در پایان، چه توصیه نهایی برای شنوندگان ما دارید؟
ENMy advice is to practice with small feelings first.
فارسیتوصیه من این است که با احساسات کوچکتر ابتدا تمرین کنید.
ENDo not wait for a big tragedy.
فارسیمنتظر یک فاجعه بزرگ نباشید.
ENPractice telling a friend, "I felt a bit disappointed when the restaurant was closed." Practice the small muscles of vulnerability.
فارسیتمرین کنید که به یک دوست بگویید، "من وقتی رستوران بسته بود، کمی ناامید شدم." عضلات کوچک آسیبپذیری را تمرین کنید.
ENThen, when the big feelings come, you will be ready.
فارسیسپس، وقتی احساسات بزرگ میآیند، آماده خواهید بود.
ENThat is excellent advice.
فارسیاین یک توصیه عالی است.
ENStart small to build strength.
فارسیاز کوچک شروع کنید تا قدرت بسازید.
ENLanguage learning is exactly the same.
فارسییادگیری زبان دقیقاً همینطور است.
ENYou practice small sentences so you can have big conversations.
فارسیشما جملات کوچک را تمرین میکنید تا بتوانید مکالمات بزرگ داشته باشید.
ENRose, thank you so much for joining us and sharing your wisdom.
فارسیرز، خیلی ممنون که به ما پیوستید و حکمت خود را به اشتراک گذاشتید.
ENThank you for having me.
فارسیاز اینکه من را دعوت کردید، متشکرم.
ENIt was a pleasure.
فارسیاین یک لذت بود.
ENIt is amazing how psychology and language go hand-in-hand.
فارسیعجیب است که چگونه روانشناسی و زبان دست به دست هم میدهند.
ENThey are both about understanding the human experience.
فارسیآنها هر دو درباره درک تجربه انسانی هستند.
ENRemember, your English does not have to be perfect to be emotional.
فارسیبه یاد داشته باشید، زبان انگلیسی شما نباید کامل باشد تا احساسی باشد.
ENPeople connect with your heart, not your grammar.
فارسیمردم با قلب شما ارتباط برقرار میکنند، نه با گرامر شما.
ENBut correct grammar helps.
فارسیاما گرامر صحیح کمک میکند.
ENYes, it certainly helps.
فارسیبله، قطعاً کمک میکند.
ENConclusion.
فارسینتیجهگیری.
ENBefore we go, I want to ask you one quick favor.
فارسیقبل از اینکه برویم، میخواهم از شما یک خواهش کوچک بکنم.
ENIf you enjoyed this episode, please write a small comment before you go.
فارسیاگر از این قسمت لذت بردید، لطفاً قبل از رفتن یک نظر کوچک بنویسید.
ENYour comments show the platforms that our community is real, active, and growing.
فارسینظرات شما به پلتفرمها نشان میدهد که جامعه ما واقعی، فعال و در حال رشد است.
ENThis support is crucial for us to continue creating new episodes every week.
فارسیاین حمایت برای ما بسیار مهم است تا بتوانیم هر هفته قسمتهای جدیدی بسازیم.
ENTell us how you are feeling today using one of the new words we learned.
فارسیبه ما بگویید امروز چگونه احساس میکنید با استفاده از یکی از کلمات جدیدی که یاد گرفتیم.
ENAre you feeling motivated?
فارسیآیا احساس انگیزه میکنید؟
ENOverwhelmed?
فارسیتحت فشار؟
ENOr perhaps relieved?
فارسییا شاید آسوده؟
ENWe need your comments because your voice is more important than ours.
فارسیما به نظرات شما نیاز داریم چون صدای شما از صدای ما مهمتر است.
ENYour voice and comments will show us the right path.
فارسیصدای شما و نظرات شما مسیر درست را به ما نشان میدهد.
ENThank you for listening.
فارسیاز اینکه گوش دادید، متشکرم.
ENSee you in the next episode.
فارسیدر قسمت بعدی میبینمتان.
Key words & phrases for Talk About Your Feelings in English, in a separate sheet for each language — with translations, usage & cultural notes, examples, and false-friend warnings shown only where they apply.
Our hand-picked, most-loved episodes — the best place to start.